I fancy myself an intrepid, if boozy, anthropologist.

Posts tagged ‘the gross parts of parenting’

It’s Friday! Here’s what I learned this week:

This week marked my reluctant entrance in to the world of cloth diapers.

Not REAL cloth diapers with safety pins and all that, but the modern day ones that don’t require a degree in geometry to fold properly.  The ones with built in elastic and snaps at the waist.

There’s nothing about me that’s hippie or granola or even remotely environmentally friendly to be honest, so I never thought I’d be ordering something called “hemp inserts”… but desperate times, my friends.

random water buffalo.

Probably 4 months ago we started having issues with Donovan soaking through his diaper at night.  Turns out that he, like me, has the bladder of a water buffalo.  This means he’ll be handy on road trips when he’s older, but in the meantime it just amounts to washing lots of sheets.  We tried going up a size in diapers, trying 2 different “overnight” varieties, we tried the “pull up” ones meant for older kids (they fit him fine) but NOTHING was working.

In researching online someone suggested cloth diapers because you could just double the inserts and *poof!* no more puddles.  The online world of cloth diapers is a dark and scary one, filled with too-many options and what I believe to be some sort of secret code.  I finally just picked a “value pack” from FuzziBunz and hoped for the best.  Some value tho, those bad boys are FREAKING EXPENSIVE.

At any rate, I waited and waited and waited but they never came.  Eventually I called the company for a refund, which they promptly gave me.  A week or so after that, my massive package of diapers came.  I called the company to get a shipping label to return them, but I never got one, so I tossed the package in my trunk and forgot about them until last weekend when I decided “what the hell, I’m down with free diapers”.

Is this where I'm supposed to put the diaper? Something doesn't look right...

What I learned:

  1. Pool Boy is sort of “waiting this one out” and clearly sees it as just another of his wife’s crazy ideas.
  2. Once you utter the phrase “just dump the solids out in the toilet” to your husband, you’re totally alone in diaper-duty from that point forward.
  3. They’re cute enough that he can roam around the house in just his diaper without being called “white trash baby” by my sister.
  4. They actually work well as overnight diapers!
  5. They also work as hats.
  6. You’d think they’d be all gross and stained after the first use, but they come out looking brand new after every wash.
  7. Whatever you do, for the love of God and all things holy, don’t use fabric softener on them.  Apparently that’s their kryptonite.
  8. Knowing that I’m doing slightly less damage to the environment than usual is a nice feeling.
  9. So is saving money every time I use one instead of a disposable.
  10. The most important thing:  They allow you to coordinate your child with your decor.  And isn’t that what we all look for in a diaper?